Though her Game of Thrones character's look [1] has remained the same over eight seasons, Emilia Clarke's relationship with beauty has been in transition. The 32-year-old actress, who famously portrays Daenerys Targaryen on the seminal show, recently revealed she had suffered two severe brain aneurysms [2], both of which had to be treated through surgery. Though her last procedure took place in 2013, Clarke has just begun publicly speaking about the life-altering experience.
In a recent interview with Stylist magazine, Clarke opened up about her self-esteem [3] following brain surgery. "I was so full of drugs from being in the hospital that I had a lot of water retention, and one half of my face was quite swollen," she said. "I felt so deeply unattractive. What I can see now is that I could see the pain behind my eyes. And no amount of anything can cover that."
"I didn't want to look at my own face."
In fact, for a period of time, Clarke would resist looking at herself in the mirror. She said, "After my operations, I didn't want to look at my own face. I don't normally, but all my emotions were heightened. When I looked in the mirror, I just saw pain in my eyes. I found it very, very difficult." She added, "I used to put on make-up without looking in the mirror, which probably made me look a lot worse."
Clarke has since regained some of her confidence, but her beauty routine has become more streamlined than it had been in the past. "[Now] I always err on the side of wearing less make-up," she said. "My face didn't change, but my feelings about myself changed."
As for her personal definition of beauty, Clarke offered a refreshing take: "Beauty is laughter. It's being inspired. If you look emaciated and tired and full of self-loathing you do not look beautiful, no matter how perfect your hair and make-up is. We should be celebrating having a giggle a bit more. Laughter is free as well, which is good."