You know those people who can't seem to turn their minds off? People who spend practically every hour of every day swimming in anxious thoughts? People who put extra pressure on themselves to be everything for everyone? (*Raises hand*) Well, that's me. It's a blessing and a curse. On one hand, it keeps me motivated and self-aware. On the other hand, it means that I'll be on a long, never-ending journey of fulfiling my life's purpose.
As much as I want to stop being so hard on myself, I worry that if I'm not ceaselessly endeavouring to better myself and make a difference in the world — in small or large ways — then I'll lose that passion and fall short of the dreams that I've always envisioned for myself. Ambition can be a labyrinth: it drives you to succeed, but it almost nullifies that success by reminding you that what you achieve will never be good enough because there's always more to accomplish. There's an added weight to your words, thoughts, and actions that makes everything feel like a high-stake situation.
If that sounds exhausting, that's because it is. But it's how I'm wired, and I've accepted it. That being said, it's something that I'm continuously learning how to manage. Anxiety and ambition aren't synonymous, so I've been figuring out ways to focus on the latter without succumbing as much to the former. For this week's Music Mood Board [1], I'm highlighting three songs that I've been playing whenever I feel myself giving in to a restless mind and overwhelming thoughts. Listen to them ahead.
