The secret to better sex [1] isn't so much a secret. Because all of our bodies and needs vary person to person, the best thing you can do to maximise pleasure is to know your body and what it likes and doesn't like. However, enjoying intense orgasms all starts with a strong foundation that is your pelvic floor, a kite-shaped sling that connects your pubic bone to your tailbone.
During a female orgasm [2], blood rushes to the pelvic area, creating a warm sensation, and your muscles contract all over. By targeting and strengthening your pelvic floor muscles [3], you can increase arousal, improve your ability to climax, and increase vaginal tone and lubrication.
But like with any other muscle in the body, it requires exercise to get into optimal shape. Try the following four tips to take pleasure to the next level.
Tweak Your Sumo Squats
Sumo squats [5] are a great way to tone and strengthen your legs and butt. Add this variation to activate your pelvic floor muscles while you're at it!
- Start in a wide stance with the toes angled outward. Inhale as you bend your knees over your toes, and feel the bones at the bottom of your pelvis spread away from each other. The kite is widening — you are stretching your pelvic floor. Your butt should be relaxed as you squat; clenching your glutes locks the hips and prevents the hip joint from moving.
- Exhale and feel the four bones at the bottom of your pelvis coming together as you straighten your legs and the pelvic floor muscles pull in and up. Focus on your perineum (or mula bandha for all you yogis), initiating the movement as you come to standing. You should feel lifted through the center of your body as you stand.
Do Kegel Exercises
If you're unfamiliar with the location of your pelvic muscles, squeeze while you're peeing to stop urination midflow. You've successfully activated those muscles!
Once you've got that down, lie on your back with your knees up and shoulder width apart. Engage those muscles you worked earlier by flexing for five seconds, and then releasing for five seconds. Repeat this four or five times and repeat once a day until you're able to squeeze your pelvic muscles without needing to tighten the rest of your body.
Practice With Ben Wa Balls
Kegel balls are hollow, body-safe balls that contain tiny weights inside of them. Insert them into the vagina as you would a tampon and allow them to rest. As they bounce around, your Kegel muscle will automatically contract in response to the weight, and over time, tighten your vaginal walls. The Luna Beads by Lelo [6] ($59) are a popular choice if you don't know where to start.
Work on Your Bridge
Who knew this glute-strengthening, ab-defining move could double as a bedroom-enhancing exercise? Engage your pelvic floor as you do a traditional bridge [8] move to get those muscles working.
- On your mat, lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Be sure and keep your feet underneath your knees, not in front. Plant your palms by each side, face down.
- Raise your hips up to the ceiling, tensing your abs, squeezing your butt, and engaging your pelvic floor as you do. You should be making a long diagonal line with your body, from shoulders to knees.
- Hold for a few seconds, making sure your spine doesn't round and your hips don't sag. Keep your abs and butt muscles engaged.
- Lower down to the ground, then repeat for 10 to 15 reps.