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Funny Doormats on Amazon

37 Amazon Doormats That Are Hilarious — We Want All of Them!

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We all know that Amazon is filled with incredible home decor, but above all, their comedic doormats deserve a shoutout. Not only are they funny, but they set the tone for a hilarious welcome. From pop culture references like "Ew, David" from Schitt's Creek to demands like "Come back with tacos (and margaritas)," these stepping pads will have your friends LOLing when they come over. So long gone are the days of boring doormats only used to wipe feet, because these outdoor rugs change the game for the better. Pick up a mat that keeps it real, like the "Gather and leave by 9" doormat, or go for a comedic "As featured on MTV Cribs" style. There's no end to the hilarious options we found on Amazon. Shop 37 of the funniest doormats on Amazon ahead — we promise you'll get a good chuckle.

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I Just Took a DNA Test . . . Turns Out I'm 100% That Witch Doormat

Perfect for Halloween — or to have out year-round, let's be honest — the I Just Took a DNA Test Turns Out I'm 100% That Witch Doormat ($40) has us singing "Good as Hell" by Lizzo as soon as we read it.

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I Just Took a DNA Test Turns Out I'm 100% That Witch Doormat
$40
from amazon.com
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Hope You Brought Whiteclaws Doormat

The Hope You Brought Whiteclaws Doormat ($25) represents 2019 in a nutshell.

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Hope You Brought Whiteclaws Doormat
$25
from amazon.com
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How You Doin' Doormat

I can hear Joey's voice perfectly while reading the Friends How You Doin' Doormat ($29).

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How You Doin' Doormat
$29
from amazon.com
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Nice Underwear Doormat

Watch out! The Nice Underwear Doormat ($29) may be seeing more than you'd like.

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Nice Underwear Doormat
$29
from amazon.com
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Watch This!

Pop Quiz

Watch the Cast of Fear Street Play a Creepy Game of Horror Movie "Would You Rather"

Ew, David Doormat

There's nothing more classic to Schitt's Creek fans than the "Ew, David" catchphrase, and the Ew, David Doormat ($17) brings it to life.

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Ew, David Doormat
$17
from amazon.com
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Probably Watching The Office Doormat

I mean . . . is the Probably Watching The Office Doormat ($31) wrong?

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Probably Watching The Office Doormat
$31
from amazon.com
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You're Like, Really Pretty Doormat

Channel your inner Regina George from Mean Girls with the You're Like, Really Pretty Doormat ($18).

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You're Like, Really Pretty Doormat
$18
from amazon.com
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Welcome to the Sh*tshow Doormat

Sometimes, it's easier to say it like it is, and the Welcome to the Sh*tshow Doormat ($20) does just that.

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Welcome to the Sh*tshow Doormat
$20
from amazon.com
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Hello (Is It Me You're Looking For?) Doormat

The Hello (Is It Me You're Looking For?) Doormat ($25) already has us singing "Hello" by Lionel Richie.

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Hello (Is It Me You're Looking For?) Doormat
$25
from amazon.com
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Bend the Knee Doormat

If you're a Game of Thrones fan, the Bend the Knee Doormat ($25) will resonate with you.

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Bend the Knee Doormat
$25
from amazon.com
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If You Forgot the Wine Go Home Doormat

Let's be honest, we're all thinking what this If You Forgot the Wine Go Home Doormat ($31) is saying.

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If You Forgot the Wine Go Home Doormat
$31
from amazon.com
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The Neighbours Have Better Stuff Doormat

If you can't be bothered, this The Neighbours Have Better Stuff Doormat ($13) puts it all on your neighbour.

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The Neighbours Have Better Stuff Doormat
$13
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Come Back With Tacos (and Margaritas) Doormat

Make guests feel useful with this Come Back With Tacos (and Margaritas) Doormat ($25).

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Come Back With Tacos (and Margaritas) Doormat
$25
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Be Our Guest but Not For Too Long . . . Then It Gets Weird Doormat

The Be Our Guest but Not For Too Long . . . Then It Gets Weird Doormat ($35) tells guests not to overstay their welcome, so you don't have to.

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Be Our Guest but Not For Too Long . . . Then It Gets Weird Doormat
$35
from amazon.com
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Come Back With a Warrant Doormat

If you're a total homebody, the Come Back With a Warrant Doormat ($24) is for you.

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Come Back With a Warrant Doormat
$24
from amazon.com
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As Featured on MTV Cribs Doormat

Prepare guests to enter your awesome abode with the As Featured on MTV Cribs Doormat ($31).

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As Featured on MTV Cribs Doormat
$31
from amazon.com
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Welcome to Maaa House Doormat

Let the sheep on the Welcome to Maaa House Doormat ($34) do the greeting for you.

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Welcome to Maaa House Doormat
$34
from amazon.com
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Hold the Door Doormat

Hold the door! The Hold the Door Doormat ($35) references Game of Thrones wonderfully.

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Hold the Door Doormat
$35
from amazon.com
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Hope You Brought Pizza Doormat

Set your expectations with the Hope You Brought Pizza Doormat ($35).

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Hope You Brought Pizza Doormat
$35
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Gather and Leave by 9 Doormat

We've all felt what the Gather and Leave by 9 Doormat ($35) is saying.

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Gather and Leave by 9 Doormat
$35
from amazon.com
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Aloe There Doormat

Plant parents will enjoy the Aloe There Doormat ($25).

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Aloe There Doormat
$25
from amazon.com
Buy Now

We Hope You Brought Wine and Dog Treats Doormat

Wine for you and a treat for your pup, the We Hope You Brought Wine and Dog Treats Doormat ($30) makes sure to cover both.

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We Hope You Brought Wine and Dog Treats Doormat
$30
from amazon.com
Buy Now

The House Was Clean Last Week (Sorry You Missed It) Doormat

If you feel guests visit when your house it at its worst, the The House Was Clean Last Week (Sorry You Missed It) Doormat ($24) is for you.

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The House Was Clean Last Week (Sorry You Missed It) Doormat
$24
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Oh No! Not You Again Doormat

The Oh No! Not You Again Doormat ($16) is only joking, of course!

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Oh No! Not You Again Doormat
$16
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Push It Real Good — the Doorbell Doormat

Don't knock! The Push It Real Good — the Doorbell Doormat ($35) says to use the doorbell.

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Push It Real Good — the Doorbell Doormat
$35
from amazon.com
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Welcome I Hope You Brought Beer Doormat

Do you prefer the Welcome I Hope You Brought Beer Doormat ($17) or the White Claw mat?

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Welcome I Hope You Brought Beer Doormat
$17
from amazon.com
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Sup Doormat

The simple Sup Doormat ($25) is the only greeting you need.

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Sup Doormat
$25
from amazon.com
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Go Away Doormat

Want to be alone? The Go Away Doormat ($20) is a great place to start.

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Go Away Doormat
$20
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Welcome! Just Don't Expect Much Doormat

If your friends come over to chill, the Welcome! Just Don't Expect Much Doormat ($50) is a must have.

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Welcome! Just Don't Expect Much Doormat
$50
from amazon.com
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Leave Doormat

If you can't be bothered, the Leave Doormat ($35) is a great solution.

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Leave Doormat
$35
from amazon.com
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Unless You Have Tequila, Girl Scout Cookies, or My Amazon Package, Go Away Doormat

We feel the Unless You Have Tequila, Girl Scout Cookies, or My Amazon Package, Go Away Doormat ($23) on so many levels.

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Unless You Have Tequila, Girl Scout Cookies, or My Amazon Package, Go Away
$23
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Hope You Like Dog Hair Doormat

Prepare guests for your pet-friendly household with the Hope You Like Dog Hair Doormat ($30).

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Hope You Like Dog Hair Doormat
$30
from amazon.com
Buy Now

If You're Pizza, Puppies, Amazon, or Joanna Gaines We're Home Doormat

The If You're Pizza, Puppies, Amazon, or Joanna Gaines We're Home Doormat ($23) lists all of the best things: pizza, puppies, Amazon, and Joanna Gaines.

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If You're Pizza, Puppies, Amazon, or Joanna Gaines We're Home Doormat
$23
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Like a Good Neighbour Stay Over There Doormat

Give your neighbours a laugh with the Like a Good Neighbour Stay Over There Doormat ($38).

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Like a Good Neighbour Stay Over There Doormat
$38
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Cover Charge Tacos or Wine Doormat

The Cover Charge Tacos or Wine Doormat ($14) is genius.

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Cover Charge Tacos or Wine Doormat
$14
from amazon.com
Buy Now

Definitely Not a Trap Door Doormat

Trick guests into think there's a trap door with the Definitely Not a Trap Door Doormat ($32).

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Definitely Not a Trap Door Doormat
$32
from amazon.com
Buy Now

What's the Password? Doormat

Create a secret password for visitors to guess with the What's the Password? Doormat ($35).

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What's the Password? Doormat
$35
from amazon.com
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