Anal sex can be tricky. It comes with a lot of hows and whats and dos that many might switch over to their private browser to search for. And while you may have some embarrassing questions about the logistics of backdoor play, know that you should never be ashamed about any of your curiosities, because chances are many others are probably thinking the same thing.
To get all of your questions answered, we asked the best person for the job. Alicia Sinclair, clinical sexologist and founder of b-Vibe anal products, didn't hold back in any of her responses — including the inevitable question about pooping during anal sex.
1. Is it safe for the partner to ejaculate during anal sex?
"If you are in a partnered relationship and/or are confident you don't have to be concerned about the possibility of getting an STI or HIV (for instance, if your partner and you were just tested), it is safe to ejaculate inside the anal canal."
2. Is it common to poop during anal sex?
"It is not common for one to actually poop during anal sex. However, you may find that faecal matter is transferred to the fingers, sex toy, or penis if you haven't taken any steps to rinse out the anal canal." (But it can happen.)
3. Are there ways to prevent that from happening?
"To prevent any poop appearances, I always suggest a bowel movement and shower at least an hour before your anal adventure.
If you want more insurance that your playtime will be clean, enema bulbs are often the easiest way to be poop-free. You can try a reusable one, or you can use a disposable enema (available at any drug store). If you use a disposable one, pour out the laxative solution, rinse the bottle out, and fill with warm water. Lubricate and insert the nozzle. You can do this on your elbows and knees or while lying on your side. Insert the nozzle and open the valve or squeeze the bulb. Hold the water for 10 to 15 seconds and release it into the toilet. You can repeat this a few times if you like. Repeat and then release all the water at once."
4. Does a condom make a difference at all to the process?
"If the person with whom you're having anal sex is a stranger or someone who you've known for a short period of time, always play it safe and wear a condom. Safer sex is better sex. The Center For Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has noted that anal sex is the riskiest sexual behaviour for getting and transmitting HIV for men and women. Specifically, the person receiving anal sex is 13 times more likely to be infected with HIV than the person inserting. Use condoms consistently to reduce the risk of acquiring HIV.
A condom does also protect the 'giver' (the one inserting) from the possibility of UTIs, as (although it is rare) bits of faecal matter may become trapped in the urethra of a penis and cause a urinary tract infection. UTIs may not be dangerous, but they can be rather unpleasant and annoying."
5. What's the best way to prevent pain during penetration?
"The key to avoiding pain is lube and attention, meaning that, if you're forcing your body (or your partner's body) to do something that doesn't feel good, it will be painful.
There are a few different reasons why anal sex might not feel good. One of the most common ones is a stinging or friction sensation. That's because there isn't enough lubricant, so you'll want to add more and more, and maybe a little more. Don't tolerate or endure discomfort because all that does is make your body tighten up. This is especially important if there's a lot of 'in and out' motion.
If you added lubricant and that isn't working, it's possible that your muscles aren't warmed up yet. Back off and go with something smaller, like one less finger or a smaller toy. Don't force it. Even if that means that you don't get to do everything you want to do this time, it'll pay off next time because you're not training your body to expect pain.
While it might seem like a good idea to use a numbing cream to reduce the discomfort from anal sex, it can actually increase the odds of hurting yourself. Most products use benzocaine, which is similar to Novocain. You want to feel what is happening in your body, both good and bad."
6. Is there a possibility of pregnancy?
"Nope. The anal canal is part of the digestive tract so there is no possibility of pregnancy."
7. Can women orgasm from anal sex?
"Absolutely! The clitoris is shaped like a wishbone and for many women, the clitoris extends all the way down to the anus. Anal orgasms happen through indirect stimulation of the G-spot and A-spot, through the shared wall between the vagina and rectum.
It's also worthwhile to mention that the feeling that it is forbidden or taboo may be appealing and make anal an intimate act that can be a massive turn-on for both partners."