University can be an extremely liberating time. In addition to living on your own [1] and making new friends, it's also the perfect time to explore your sexuality [2], meet a wealth of interesting people, and learn more about your personal preferences in the bedroom [3]. But regardless of how, when, or with whom you're hooking up [4], you always want to make sure you're being safe — on all fronts — and that includes everything from being in constant communication with your friends to always carrying your own protection [5].
You should feel free and empowered to (consensually) hook up how you like, whether it's a dance-floor kiss or having a friend with benefits [6]. But doing so with complete reckless abandon can easily spell trouble, and understanding how to safely hook up with someone is vital, not just for your sake, but for the sake of your sexual partners, too. Keep reading for seven must-know tips for hooking up safely in college and beyond.
— Additional reporting by Theresa Massony
Share Your Location With Your Friends
Always have a go-to pal that you can share your location [8] with so that someone trusted always knows where you're at in case of an emergency. If you have an iPhone, you can do this via iMessage and can share your location for one hour, until the end of the day, or indefinitely. If you don't have an iPhone, you can do this using Google Maps.
Spill the Details
Even if you share your location, your friends rightly won't be monitoring your every move. A simple text giving them a heads up of where you are or where you're heading is always smart. Also, let them know who you're with! First names, last names, and even an Instagram account is helpful — that way your friends know exactly who you're hanging out with. If you don't know your partner's name or the part of town/campus you're at, re-evaluate the situation. Never feel weird about pausing to ask for more details and always make sure you feel 100 percent comfortable with the situation. And just as you checked in on your way over, shoot your friends a message letting them know when you leave or if you won't be coming home for the night.
Always Carry Your Own Condoms
You can't always rely on other people to have protection, so make sure you're protecting yourself by carrying your own condoms. Your sexual health should be your top priority, and you should feel empowered to take matters into your own hands.
Know Your Status and the Status of Your Partner
Getting tested is always a great precaution before hooking-up. Know your HIV and STI status, and ask your partner for theirs! Condoms are great and all, but even they don't protect you 100 percent of the time.
Have a Buddy System
Rally your crew to walk with you or pick you up from somewhere. You should never walk home alone at night or in the wee hours of the morning, so put a buddy system in place so that you and your friends always have each other's backs!
Watch Your Drink
If you're out at a bar or restaurant, keep an eye on your cocktail and don't accept a drink that you didn't see the bartender prepare. If you're over at your partner's house, watch your drink being made so that you know exactly what's in it and that nothing suspicious was slipped in. Resources like Undercover Colours [9] can help test your drinks for drug tampering.
Trust Your Gut
This may sound like a no-brainer, but always listen to your gut instinct. If it feels off or the vibe just isn't there, it's totally OK to say, "Sorry, this isn't working for me," and leave without feeling guilty.