On the journey to find "the one," very few of us get it right the first time [1] (or second, or third, or . . . you get the idea). While a small but lucky few meet and marry before ever having their hearts broken [2], the road to true love for the vast majority of us is peppered with failed relationships and entire boxes of Kleenex (cue the Alanis Morissette soundtrack and cheap wine).
While breakups undoubtedly suck, they also teach us invaluable lessons [3]. We leave the relationship with a little more wisdom and self-awareness [4] than when we entered, putting us one step closer to finding genuine compatibility. But the truth is, most of us have been guilty of staying in a relationship long past its expiration date at some point in our lives, but men and women will stick it out for different reasons. To find out why the guys will stay in failing relationship, we asked 10 men to share their reasons for sticking around long past leaving time. Here's what they had to say.
All in the Family
"She was super close to my family, and I knew I would never hear the end of it once I broke up with her. My sisters still give me crap to this day."
Wasted Time
"We fought all the time, but we had been together for a long time. I didn't want the past four years to be a total waste of time. I was mad at her when she broke up with me, but now I'm with an amazing woman that's perfect for me, so I guess she did me a huge favour."
I Can Fix That
"Honestly, it was a pride thing. I thought I could fix. I didn't want to admit that I couldn't."
Losing a Shoulder to Cry On
"When I was younger, I thought guys were supposed to be tough and not talk about their feelings out loud. My buddies and I would talk sports and music, not emotions. But with my ex, I could open up and be totally vulnerable. Eventually we grew apart and I knew the relationship was doomed, but I didn't want to lose the only person I could really talk to."
It's Comfortable
"I'll just say it – I was lazy. We weren't super happy, but I was not looking forward to getting back in the dating game. I knew I would have to hit the gym and spend a lot of money taking girls out. So I figured I would just stay where I was comfortable."
Law of Attraction
"I know this might sound superficial, but she was so hot. I knew I would never get a girl that looked like her again, so I stayed for months after it was probably time to break up."
The Thought of Another Man
"It was the thought of seeing her with another dude, especially thinking about the physical part. I couldn't handle it."
Not the Fighting Kind
"Anytime I tried to bring up the subject of us and our problems, she got combative. I am not a conflict person; there was never any type of arguing in my house growing up. I knew she would get mad, so I just kept it to myself that I wasn't happy for a while."
The Right Thing to Do
"We hadn't been good for a long time, but I made a commitment. Men honour their commitments, so I stayed and tried for years. I thought I was doing the noble thing."