"Who are you dating these days?" "Why are you still single?" "Don't you ever feel alone?" These are just a few of the questions single girls everywhere are constantly asked. Whether we want to admit it or not, being single carries a certain stigma that's hard to shake. As women, we're raised with a lot of things that tell us that having that perfect relationship is the ultimate goal, whether it's from movies, books, or couples in our own lives who we want to emulate. To "have it all," we need that perfect partner and beautiful family. And while there's nothing wrong with striving to reach that goal, many women tend to miss the pure importance (and fun!) that comes with being single.
Following in the footsteps of Carrie Bradshaw [1] has been on my list of things to do since I caught my first glimpse of Sex and the City [2] when I was younger. My mom wanted to have it on one night so she could keep up with the episodes, but she had to turn the volume down every few minutes to shield our ears from hearing a Samantha comment somewhere along the lines of: "Men cheat for the same reason dogs lick their balls: because they can!" She also had to constantly turn it completely off when things started getting hot and heavy in Carrie's (completely unattainable) apartment on the Upper East Side. But seeing the sheer confidence, power, and fun that these four women had sans partners made me realise there's so much beauty and power in being single.
So, as a 20-something single girl living in New York City, I knew it was time to rewatch the iconic show, and this time, I took away valuable lessons I had missed before. From devastating breakups to the excitement of meeting someone new, the ups and down of falling in and out love are perfectly portrayed by the strong women in this show. Carrie's deep desire to be loved can be seen in all of us. Samantha's confidence is a reminder that we are all worth more. Miranda's passion for her career and goals for her life prove that working hard pays off. And Charlotte's dream of having that perfect life shows that sometimes the best plans are the ones that change.
From dating to sex to everything in between, the lessons found in Sex and the City are relevant to anyone at any stage of their life. But for me, the lessons I learned about the significance of being single made me understand that the most important relationship we can have is with ourselves. And I couldn't help but wonder, is being single the best thing to be in my 20s? According to your favourite foursome from Sex and the City, it is, and here's exactly why.
You Can Go Out With the Girls Every Night of the Week
Forget date night — a girls' night out is so much more fun!
You Can Put Your Energy Into Work and Not Feel Bad About It
Balancing a career and having a relationship on top of just having a life is easier said than done. Being single gives you the chance to put all of your passion and energy into work without any distraction. Also, let's not forget that having a career is something you should never have to apologise for.
You Can Date Whoever (and Do Whoever)
Because you're single, remember?
You Don't Have to Dress to Impress Anyone
Your partner might (emphasis on the might) notice if you wear the same shirt three days in a row, but if you're single, who's to say?
You Don't Have to Worry About Things That People in Relationships Worry About
No more losing sleep over if your partner is cheating on you, well, because you don't have one!
You Can Let Your Wandering Eyes ~Wander~
See that hottie at 12 o'clock? We did, too.
You Can Experiment More Freely
Inside and outside of the bedroom, of course!
You Find Out What You Want in a Relationship
We don't always stan Mr. Bigg, but we can't deny that he said it best.
You Realise That Your Friends Are Your Soulmates
Giving a relationship all of your time and effort will force other relationships to the side. If you're single, you can channel your energy into building deeper connections with your friends. Charlotte was onto something when she said, "Maybe we could be each other's soulmates. Then we could let men be just these great, nice guys to have fun with."
You Realise Being Single Isn't That Bad
Maybe you like the freedom of being alone. Maybe you don't need someone else to make you happy. And maybe there isn't someone for everyone, and that's OK.