How to Get Kids to Focus on the Positive

1 Encourage Positive Self-Talk

Part of learning to focus on the positive involves seeing the best in ourselves, which in turn creates a more positive overall attitude. How we talk to ourselves can be a self-fulfiling prophecy. Remember that famous Henry Ford quote: "If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right." Teach your kid to focus on their strengths by asking them to compile a list of their best skills and attributes. Feel free to contribute.

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2 Model Positive Thinking

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Our kids watch everything we do, so remember when you're melting down because the coffee shop got your order wrong or you can't find your favourite lip gloss, your child is taking note and learning that it's normal to sweat the small stuff. Instead, try to model positive thinking, even when it doesn't come naturally.

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3 Open Up Their World View

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Once your child is old enough, find a place where you can volunteer together. Not only will the experience teach your child to appreciate what they have because others have much less, but it's a great way to spend quality time together and help them develop a generosity of spirit that will last throughout their lifetime.

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4 When Things Get Negative, Change the Environment

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If your child starts spinning in a pessimistic direction or focusing on something negative, instead of starting a lecture they don't want to hear, consider changing the environment, especially if it involves some fresh air. Take a quick walk or head to a swing set. Take a drive to a pretty spot and explore. Getting out of the house and into the great outdoors can have a calming effect and remind us of how much beauty there is in the world.

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5 Help Them Reframe Tough Situations

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If your child is upset about a setback or disappointment, help them embrace the challenge. Validate the negative feelings; then help your child reframe those thoughts in a more positive way. "I didn't do well on my maths test, but I'm a hard worker, and I'm going to study to do better on the next one." "I didn't get the toy I wanted at the store, but I can add it to my birthday wish list." Let your child know that they're not alone in their struggles; you're there to support them and help them find their way to a happier place.

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6 Use Struggles to Teach Them to Look on the Bright Side

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Stuck at the airport with a delayed flight, or dealing with an injury that's kept them out of the game? Use the time to teach your kids about how much of life has both good and bad aspects. Sure, you're not moving as fast as you'd like, but now you have a chance to try that airport ice cream spot, start that book you've been wanting to read, or spend some quality time together. Most bad situations have a silver lining, and focusing on that is the quickest path to feeling better.

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