Since as early as I can remember, I've always wished I had a sibling [1]. Part of the reason is inexplicable — just this longing that I've felt for a brother or sister my entire life — and the other part is made up of smaller reasons, mainly that all of my best friends and cousins grew up with siblings [2] and I was never not envious. Because of the sense of loss I felt growing up an only child [3], I've always vowed never to have just one child myself.

Simply put, I'd never want my only child to grow up feeling the way I did — like I was missing out on something so huge [4] and important. My best friend, Meagan — also an only child — has always felt as close to a sister as I'll ever get, and I know if I had an only child, they'd find their chosen siblings in truly great friends as well, but that just doesn't feel like enough. Some people who grow up as their parent's lone child [5] completely thrive in being the one and only [6], but that wasn't my experience, and it may not be my child's either.

I feel so passionately about having at least two children that before I met my boyfriend, I'd literally write men off after the first date if they noted that they'd only want one kid in the future. And while I fully understand (and think about often) that I could struggle with conceiving, that doesn't affect my personal decision in the slightest. Whether I'm able to have biological children or my partner and I adopt [7], there's just no way I can slice it where I see myself raising an only child [8].

All this said, here are even more reasons I'd never want to have an only child [9].

I want my kids to have a built-in best friend.

Sure, not every set of siblings grows up being the best of friends, but there's something about a sibling bond that means they'll always be there for each other even if they have separate friend groups. Friends come and go, but siblings are forever.

They'll be able to confide in each other.

As siblings grow older, they can become confidantes in each other and talk about those things that, no matter how open they are with their parents, they just don't want to talk to an adult about. Especially if it's something about their own parents — it's nice for them to have someone who can understand their family dynamic to turn to.

Having a sibling teaches valuable lessons.

From learning how to share toys and parents' time to discovering the best ways to resolve conflicts thanks to constant bickering and fighting, there's much to be learned from sharing close quarters with a sibling.

They'll have someone to reflect on their childhood with.

I definitely have stories about the crazy things my friends and I got up to as kids, but they have those same stories in addition to the experiences they shared at home with their siblings. Having those memories together and separate from the memories they make with their parents will last a lifetime and will always be special.

They'll have someone by their side in difficult times.

Whether my partner and I are fighting or something is troubling the family as a whole, my kids will have each other to lean on and talk to. And inevitably, they'll have each other's shoulders to cry on when it's time to say goodbye to their parents — and they'll still have each other in their immediate family unit once their parents are gone.

The pressure to impress and succeed would be divided between them.

No parent seeks to put pressure on their kids to do well in school and be successful, but we all want the best for the people in our lives, especially ones we've raised ourselves. When it comes time for report cards and science fairs, it'll be nice for the kids to know they're not trying to impress their parents alone, and they may even try harder in order to one-up their siblings (of course, I'll love them no matter what, but a little healthy competition never hurt anybody, right?).

I've always felt I'd thrive as a mom.

Don't get me wrong — I know it's going to be hard (nannying two kids that weren't mine was a challenge enough), but I also know that, for me, being a mom is going to be the most amazing thing I've ever done. Having had the experience of nannying an only child turned older brother, I know that life only gets sweeter with the increased chaos — so sign me up.