Mom's Funny Sample Quarantine Schedule For Her Kids
Because We All Need a Laugh: This Mom’s Family Quarantine Schedule Isn’t Going Very Well
I think it's safe to assume that we could all use a bit of humour in our lives right about now, and mom of six, Jen Fulwiler, is giving us that laugh. The SiriusXM radio host and standup comedian has been, like all of us, trying to create some kind of schedule for her children during this time of social distancing due to the coronavirus outbreak, and well, it's not exactly going smoothly for her.
In the relatable post to Facebook, Jen shared a photo of the sample schedule, which runs from 8 a.m. to 11 p.m. — but don't worry, she's only making her kids get up at 8, as she's planning on sleeping in until 10 while her kids have "Feral Time." Once she's up at 10, it's time for the day's first real slot: screen time.
"Keep your chargers near," she warns. The schedule continues: "11 a.m. - 12 p.m.: Fight Over Video Games. Kids who say they're bad at maths monitor siblings' Xbox turns with nuclear precision. 12 p.m. - 1 p.m.: Screens. We've become one with the borg. 2 p.m. - 3 p.m.: Fight Over Toys. Turns out a baby doll head is a lethal weapon." The Fulwiler family's day carries on with more screen time, haphazard pantry meals (Cheetos and Ranch dressing, anyone?), and time for gin and a juice box for mom.
"Other folks are sharing their schedules so I wanted to share mine," Jen wrote in the post's caption. "I am available for life coaching services." We'll be signing up, Jen!
All jokes aside, it's not going to be easy to keep our kids busy, learning things, and feeling positive and happy during this uneasy time. Putting on an educational show during screen time is totally OK and more valuable than you might think in most cases, but it's also fine to just throw on a feel-good movie and hunker down on the couch for family snuggles. Do what works for your crew; all we can do is our best while navigating this uncharted territory together.
