How to Talk About Face Masks: Validate, Ask, Set a Boundary

To avoid an argument in which no one wins and everyone gets angry, Gaylor suggested a three-step approach.

Validate. The first step might be the hardest: "We're going to validate their right to have their own opinion," Gaylor said. "We're not debating whether a person has a right to have a different view." Gaylor suggested saying something like, "I understand you may feel differently about this. I understand you may have different views. You absolutely have a right to feel differently."
Ask. Once you've shown you understand and respect their opinion, you shift to your "ask." "I'm asking you, even if you don't agree, can you just wear a mask while we're together?" Gaylor suggested saying. "At that point, that person has a choice. They can still hold on to their view, but also honour what you're asking them to do." Essentially, you're giving them a way to comply without accepting defeat, because they don't have to give up their own opinion. "They actually are being empathic and altruistic and compassionate in their approach," Gaylor explained. "They're wearing the mask as a stance of compassion as opposed to a stance of defeat."
Set a boundary. "You hope you don't get there, but the third step is that you have to set a boundary, for yourself, for your loved ones," Gaylor said. With someone you don't know, that might be asking them to leave a public setting, or maybe leaving yourself. With a friend or family member, it may be that you can't see them in-person or have discussions about this topic. "Maybe it's 'I can't have you over, if you're not willing to respect where I'm coming from,'" Gaylor said. "'It's not that I'm upset that you disagree, I really need you to respect where I'm coming from.'"

Image Source: Getty / Thomas Tolstrup