During Your Therapy Session
- Take notes. "Your therapist may drop a nugget in a session that you don't want to forget, so having a notebook and pen nearby can come in handy," says therapist Bianca Walker, LPC. (You can also take notes on your phone or computer, though they have the potential to be distracting.) Taking notes will help you digest information and better remember any breakthroughs you might have. It's also a good idea to jot down any goals or "assignments" you have for the coming week.
- Be honest. Many therapists offer this advice, which sounds simple in theory but is a little tougher in practice. "It can be hard or uncomfortable for many people to come into the therapy space and share [things honestly], as there aren't many places in the world where people spend 50+ minutes talking about themselves," says mental health counselor Corrine Harris, PhD, LCMHC. She encourages clients to "push past their discomfort" and be as transparent and forthcoming as possible, "so that the therapist can gain a better understanding of who the client is and what they're experiencing."
- Talk about the things you'd like to cover in the session, but don't be afraid to go "off-script." If you've jotted down some things you want to talk about, feel free to share a loose agenda with your therapist so you're both on the same page with what you want to talk about. At the same time, though, don't worry if you stray from your plan. "During sessions, sharing what's coming up for you or where your mind goes isn't random," says certified art therapist Jackie Tassiello, ATR-BC, LCAT. "Letting your therapist know your thoughts, memories, or associations during sessions can be a gateway to more self-awareness."
- Ask questions. "If your therapist is saying things you don't understand, ask for clarification," says psychotherapist Keischa Pruden, LCMHCS, LCAS, CCS. "Therapists can often fall into 'clinical speak' without realising it. Asking for clarification can be their signal to simplify their explanations."
- Don't stress about what the therapist is thinking. "If you notice in your day-to-day life that you tend to hold back your emotions in order to not burden people with your feelings, therapy is an excellent place to give yourself permission to feel and express any and all emotions that show up," says somatic therapist Victoria Smith, LCSW. Know that your therapist will not feel burdened by you, no matter how heavy the topics or how big your emotions. "Therapists do the work they do so that people can feel safe and supported" to fully feel their emotions, Smith explains. On the same note, it's natural to want to avoid sharing certain details or experiences with your therapist for fear of being judged. Remember that this is a judgement-free zone, and there's no need to try to appear perfect to your therapist. They're here to help you through the very issues that you're nervous about sharing.
Image Source: Getty / Lucy Lambriex