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- Some guy's shirt is already off — is this gonna be like Magic Mike?
- Whoo! Hannah's the Bachelorette . . . so does this mean they get married later?
- Yeah, why not film her awkwardly standing under a bridge? But just thinking about walking through that field of wheat makes my arms itchy.
- Roll tide? Roll tide!
- Who's the guy at the hardware store? Her uncle? A neighbour? Does everyone in Tuscaloosa just know each other?
- Pageant life seriously looks so stressful.
- Whoa, Alabama is so scenic and pretty. Her Instagram aesthetic must be gorgeous.
- Colton! He's the fence jumper from The Bachelor, right?
- HANNAH. YOU. ARE. GOOD. ENOUGH.
- She's a ballet teacher and she looks like a model in a bikini? Why is she even on this show?