Once the intense emotions begin to soften, there's no better time to reflect – on the relationship, on ourselves, on what went wrong, but also what went right. It's a wonderful time of self-discovery and typically when the lessons learned will be the most palpable. Science backs us up here. A study by researchers Ty Tashiro and Patrcia Frazier found that after a breakup, people report on average five areas of growth in regards to themselves and future relationships.