It is all too common for adults to tell kids to "stop" doing something. "Rather than saying, 'don't yell at your sister!' instead say, 'try using your calm voice,' and then lay on the praise once they do," Dr. Grodberg said. This is especially important as children grow up and become more independent and self aware. When children predominantly have their negative behaviours pointed out to them, this can interfere with their development of healthy self-esteem and confidence.